Unicorns, Jabberwockies, and Southern Hospitality...Oh My!

(Carol Burnett as 'Eunice')

When did being Southern become

(erroneously) synonymous with sweetness, kindness,

and a hospitable nature?

("G.C.B." gets it right!)

People from all over clamor for the lovely nature
of 'those wunnerful Southerners...o filled with hospitality.'

Well, we're filled with something all right....
more akin to beans and hot air!



(The caricature in action.)



It's a B.S. Fest down here; a sub-nation of

shuckers and jivers and con-artists and frauds

and errant little boys and ne'er-do-wells.

But as long as we're smiling and slapping

folks on the back, it's all good, I guess!

(The reality laid bare.)

Yup, Jethro's pressing the flesh and story-telling
with a lost Yankee, chatting it up while the meth
lab is running, the stolen copper is stored in the back yard,
the moonshine is hidden away, the abused kids are
in the house, and the dog on a 1-foot-long chain is
out-of-sight.

 So, either the South has the best PR team (and source of

con men and charmers) the world has ever seen-- in which

case, can't we at least have something to show for it? That 'rise

again' nonsense has been a long time coming!--or the

world is full of a bunch of naive/stupid people who are

itching to be made fools of.

(Or maybe a little of both?)

As an insider, take it from me--all that 'impressive'

sugary magnolia honey-pie saccharine bullshit is

less than skin-deep. If superficiality were a

nickel, we'd all be millionaires.

***