Granted, some people are genuinely generous and
the assistance comes from a place of compassion and
concern. Most efforts to do for are a form of largesse,
pure and simple, and stem from a desire to control,
manipulate, or stroke ego.
Some of my aversion to 'help' could be foolish pride.
Some say "What matters the source or the motives
if you have a need?" That I should take advantage of
what's offered when it's offered and not consider the
source. You can be particular once you're ahead in the
game.
They point out that even the wealthy have sponsors
and benefactors they don't agree with or like, but they
are answerable to because they hold the keys to the
kingdom. And there's always somebody ahead of you in
line. There are always concessions and compromises in
this world.
But some price tags are too steep. Some strings that are
attached to presents are to be avoided...especially if they
are an invisible and secretive variety. Granted, if someone
has the gifts to get by and succeed in this world, their
level of ego/hubris/disconnect may be so in swing they're
unaware of it.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder makes
someone feel that the world exists to meet their needs, and
a person suffering from it can convince themselves of anything
they want to....justify anything they want to.....disregard
anything--and anyone--they want to. It's all about self-need
and bottom line. That is the reality of what makes this world work.
Maybe there are just too many variables to break it down.
-Some wealth is completely random; inheritance, Lottery winnings,
other prizes, ridiculous settlements and more come to mind.
-Some people who work hard their whole lives have nothing to
show for it.
-Some people are blessed with carefree existence,
and others meet disaster after disaster or setbacks in their daily
living.
I do believe we have some ability to affect and influence our lives,
but it is hard work to unbind decades of thinking and societal
influence. There are add-in factors like physical health, mental
health, geographics, etc that also pose additional challenges,
but they are not insurmountable.
The world is divided into privilege...and lacking. The middle
ground is getting swallowed up all the time. We humans tend to
attach values judgments on circumstance. We apply non-existent
evaluative principles to conditions of monetary status.
The poor come to feel they are poor because it is what they deserve or
all they can amount to, that life is unfair and they are part of the
unlucky ones who will always have to struggle for a bit.
The rich come to feel superior based on the prestige reflected
back on them in their surroundings. They believe they are blessed
and different--better, and their success is a benefit of their perceived
importance..
The issue isn't going to be resolved easily. Maybe it's just one of
those cold hard realities of this vicious world. But let's not ignore the
elephant in the room!
If you're living easy and you try and compare your hardships to those
of someone who can't pay for basics, it isn't going to fly. If you're trying
to compete or get approval from someone who frivolously drops more cash
in a single night than it takes you to live off of in a month, you're chasing
windmills baby. Give up the ghost.
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