Ricky Perry has started his campaign in earnest. He may
yet be the next elephant man (the likely Republican
nominee,) as his mind is surely as deformed as the original's
body.)
Perry and fellow nut Bachmann claim they hear voices
(not, but the way, a good sign for political leaders.)
Each say that "God" has spoken to them, instructing
them to run for office.
It's important to note that neither expands on which 'god' has
its hand up their hind quarters. I am here to further explore this.
I have actually been speaking with Yahweh/J.C. his own
self, and he assures me that he has nothing to do with either
Schmuck Extraordinaire.
He states, in fact, that there is NO affiliation between the
heavenly good and either candidate. Suggested was that we
look lower for a point of origin.
Upon inspection of the Dark Lord of Hades, he confirmed
that Rick Perry is in fact his favorite son, sent to spread
discord and dissent amongst the world, paving the way for
Satan to rule.
As a reward for all the bad done in Texas, Lucifer says
that he has sent horrible droughts and raging infernos to
show the world the gifts he intends to set loose on the
populace should he be set free by Perry being ushered
into the White House.
"The flames of discontent will consume you all!" he
chortled.
Pushed about Bachmann, Satan appeared offended and
quipped "Hell no! Even I wouldn't associate with that
crazy bitch!"
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